Proverbs on silence

If only i had read this earlier, all these wouldn't have happened.. huhuh ..

So, readers, have a read and ponder about it when your mouth starts to get itchy ..

In the multitude of words sin is not lacking,        

But he who restrains his lips is wise.  

                                                   Proverbs 10:19

          He who guards his mouth preserves his life,       

But he who opens wide his lips shall have destruction. 

                                                    Proverbs 13:3        

Whoever guards his mouth and tongue      

 Keeps his soul from troubles.           

                                          Proverbs 21:23          

 The heart of the righteous studies how to answer,    

   But the mouth of the wicked pours forth evil.      

                                               Proverbs 15:28  

There are more, you all can check in out on this website below:

http://solitaryroad.com/prs21.html

jogging in the rain

I had a dream, of jogging in the rain. The feeling was so soothing and i felt revived by the raindrop splashing on my face. i really feel so burden. I've made a too late decision, which is not to post any offensive blog message, but i guess it's too late..oh well, i'll have to move on, no use lamenting on the past. I don't want to talk about it.

So, let's start with my dream again. Hmm...

It was a weird dream, i was sleeping under a tree, it was already raining so you could imagine the ground was wet but i couldn't feel it. I heard a song that lifted my spirit and i jogged straight away.

I've been feeling very sad lately. I guess the road is my journey and I'm all alone, the road is curved and i can't see any ending beyond it.

But I just keep on jogging. The air was refreshing because the rain was now less and it was actually drizzling.

I guess the best translation is i have to walk this road alone. I must finish the things i have started. I know i have offended alot of people this week, I guess it's time to say i'm sorry.

I've been reflecting on myself and i hate that part of me that's too direct. I know it hurts people but i still go on with it, it's obvious they're tired of me already.

Well, now practically i have no one beside me because i caused something to happen. I want to feel sorry for myself but i can't, i've created this hell of a mess and i have to pay for my sins..

Like i say, nobody's perfect, which of course includes me..

and I didn't realise i have friends until i lose them. I will start from the beginning.

Return to the old me who always focus on her work and also korean dramas..

In fact, now i'm starting to catch up with the korean drama's my friend gave me a long time ago.

I don't want to care much about anything other than my work and dramas..

I will be much happier i guess..

and one thing for sure, i will learn to appreciate the things which i have lost after this hard lesson..

Remember: I must finish the journey I started, to those reading this blog, thanks for loving me the way i am, and once again i want to say i'm sorry if i have offended u in any kind of way..

From today on, this blog will be more on my life in general, not too in depth and also i will reflect more on the RAiNboWS in my life ..

LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL .. :)

My idol

He's perfect. Just the person i'm looking for. Tall. Fair. Handsome. Athletic. and one could say he's everything that i want. Just today, i found the right word for him. He's nothing but an idol that i admire. Sad to say but that's the truth. and it hurts. I like him, but he's just too far away. It's like he's in Mars, and i'm on earth.

I guess I've figured it out too late. It really hurts me alot just to think about it. Well, i guess i have to move on with my life, but i will still like him anyway. Because he's the one for me .. :) I hope that one day he'll know that i exist, that's the least he could do right?? huhu ..

My story: It started with a glance

I always saw him around but i never thought things would get that far. I admit I had done something to make him notice me. But it's not what you think ok? It's stupid but naive.. But I'm not ashamed of it. I feel happy. I had achieved something in the whole of my life, like finally!! The incident was months ago, but I will never forget the day. Who knows what will happen in the future? I will never stop hoping until something comes up and can convince me to give up upon him. I just hope i wouldn't be the last one to know.

He's really committed to his studies and also family, or so i've heard. I really admire him because he's very serious and does not take anything lightly. He said he was not ready for any relationship. Though sad but i guess that's what i like about him too. He's honest. He doesn't fake his feelings like most guys would in order to get more girlfriends on their list.

So far, being single is fine but of course, occasionally i would envy those who have their partner with them when they go to the movies, because i'm either alone or with my girlfriends..

I guess i have to go now. Catch up soon..

This is Christiano Ronaldo, it's his idol, and now i like him too.. but somehow he also looks like him.. heheh ..

When U smile

I don't know why everytime i see you i will smile, and everytime you smile i will also follow suit. But I don't like you. I just see you as a friend, so it's normal right? But when someone talks to you, i feel annoyed, am i jealous? nop, i just get annoyed.. that's it. Am i denying what my heart is trying to tell me?? I'm not sure..

Today i saw u again. but I decided to act cool, how i wish i could be myself but i can't. hmm..

Anyway, today is really tiring because i prepared everything for the role play and yet it can't be recorded today just because someone had to get the promotion, i wish to forget about today so i won't be discussing it further.

Tomorrow there will be an exam or quiz on badminton, finished reading the notes but seriously, i'm not confident at all, so i'm going to have to depend on my common sense. Same thing, I lack common sense, i can't always think outside of the box.. = =''

These few days have been very stress and i feel my life is upside down, i feel lost, and i need someone to guide me .. fortunately i have a guide, who will never leave me like other people.. my Saviour.. God's words have never failed me till today. When I'm down, verses and scriptures suitable for me will just somehow pop out at the right time. To me, it's God's will, not coincidence, because i'm positive some non-believers will say it that way, like "you're exaggerating too much".

Well, only God and i knows.. :) I'd better get going. bye..

Something I need

Humans have so many flaws .. I find myself far from being fixed, it's like I'm damaged for good. But one thing that kept me going through each day is God's words. It's like food to my spiritual hunger. Now, in the midst of assignments and all things, I feel so depressed because of certain things which i can't openly discuss but i just feel hurt, why can't i ever go through the assignments easily? there must always be obstacles, different heads, procrastination.. I hate that part the most. but when i ask questions, i will become the BOSSY member. "Who does she think she is? stupid girl!" fine.. I didn't push but the work just never gets done, until the night before we are suppose to hand in the assignment! Can i conclude that every students on this face of this earth will surely face this kind of problem, if you deny my statement, then surely you are one of those lazy people! I try not to get mad, because it's bad for my health, but i can't help it. I've been tolerating this scenario for 2 years already .. It's already like a cycle of life ..

Today I'll talk about something i need. I need peace and wisdom because with that i believe i will not get mad and know the importance of taking one day at a time. Now, i simply can't, really disappointed in myself because I'm human!

Starting from today i will do my best and depend of God's love for me. There's so many semesters more to go before i graduate so this is just the beginning.. Patience Sophia ~~ good night everyone and God bless in this assignment month .. :)

Hungry physically and spiritually

I only had instant coffee and biscuits for my dinner, and now my stomach is killing me, so i'm munching on mamee monster. At least my stomach would be quiet for a while.

Actually I planned on sleeping early because i had the symptoms of getting a fever. feel cold and the air is chilly but now i feel a little better.

tomorrow is monday and i really dread it because it's going to class all over again. but the difference is my assignments just keep on increasing and I've got to finish them in such a short period of time. Hunger in the physical is still ok because you can fill your stomach with food. But spiritually? It's not simple as i thought it was. The more you hunger for God, the more the devil will try to stop you by putting trials and temptations. But, we must always stay strong and believe in God's promise.

I just read from the Daily Bread recently and one of the writers wrote, something like this, troubles can either lead to to God or against it. I prayed and my day turned upside down immediately. My rice cooker was confiscated and it was so not my fault because my friend borrowed it and she just put in at the pantry. what a lucky day for the warden to come..

What did you expect me to do? I cursed like hell and promised never to lend anything to her anymore. She didn't even feel sorry at all!!! Not the least bit sorry! How could I not be mad and i was really mad. I straight away went to sleep and when i woke up, I reconsider my anger, I knew it couldn't be avoided. but the question is, has the days incident brought me nearer to God or further from Him? I was ashamed of my actions because i did it based on the heat of the moment. I regretted my action, prayed for forgiveness. That day really taught me a huge lesson. To God or against Him, as simple as that. I really pray for more patience and also today's bible reading was that Solomon asked for wisdom from God and today i ask for God's mercy and forgiveness and also pray for patience and also wisdom in action and in everything i do. Good night all .

Which road to choose??

Have you ever thought of which way you're going when you're at the crossroad of your life? or u just prefer to choose the road that is more exciting, more fun and all the things the world has to offer to you. Well, I guess you better take the better look at the road that you are about to travel.

I've been thinking about what topic to write and after today, I just knew what to write.

Going to the Alpha course for the third round starting from last year has really transformed my life. Each Alpha changed my life in a different way in various perspectives. I learned to know about a God who is so merciful and loving, slow to anger but rich in kindness. I'm born in a Christian family but honestly speaking, I didn't live a Christian life until I went to this Alpha course, it's not to say that I'm a holy person now, I'm doing my best to alter the mistakes I have made in the past.

Anyway back to the topic which is "Which road to choose", the decision we make today affects the life we live tomorrow. It's vital that we make a wise choice. The reason why I want to talk about this is because after going to today's Alpha, which is the first meeting, mentioned about this, which really disturbed my mind because now I'm going through one of those bad times, as you can say it.

The question is, would you choose your own feelings or the promises of God?

My answer: the promises of God, for sure! I don't trust in myself anymore. It's not just difficult, it's impossible. which is why every time I pray, "Lord, I surrender everything to you". I can't do this alone, I can't manage it alone, I'm just simply too tired. Like now, when I'm facing hardship and all, my heart is actually asking me to blame everything on God because He didn't help me when I fell into the ditch. But in the Bible, God promised us all, saying that "I will not forsake you nor abandon you". This promise is great enough to raise me up and face the challenge again.

Which brings us to the main topic again, no matter which road you will choose, remember, do it based on what God has promised us, and NOT on our foolish and naive emotions. I made that decision and it really transformed my life. I know I'm not perfect and I'm still human, which means I still get mad, I still gossip, but one thing for sure, I know God is always there even though sometimes we feel He's not. That's why Jesus told Thomas, "Blessed are those who have not seen and yet believed". Like what I remembered from the Alpha course earlier, God has given us lots of evidence, and we should be thankful because it means our faith is not a blind faith. We believe in One living God. Amen ..

Let's pray together: Lord, I pray that my trust in you will increase as each day passes and despite all the sufferings I'm going through, if it's for You, I'm willing to, because You said, "those who believe in me will live even though they die." ..