Home at last

Finally ...

Exams over!! finished wednesday, did packing and my flight was thursday. And now im with my beloved family. The holidays begin.. Went out with my mom and sisters today. It was fun. 

Tomorrow morning going to church and going to visit my grandpa. 

WOW... Can't believe all of this is over, finally. My second year of degree is over, and next year will be the third year. More challenges to come but i will overcome it because i know how to. 

Now, i want to forget anything related to studies and stress and just relax and have fun with my family. SO far, everything's doing great. Being at home has never been such a good thing. I love the comfort of home. Well, I guess that's it for today. I have so many things to catch up with, a good example, my reading!! I bought so many books during this book fair and now i really want to finish reading it .. Bye and God bless..

Alone, for a reason

Like any other days ...

(Sometimes i really feel like this, we can't deny it. But now i know that God is always watching over me. Amen!! no copyright intended, just sharing)

Had my exam today, the last paper is on Wednesday and later its home im going!! Everyday is a challenge, it has a challenge of its own. I, am still trying to control my temper, its unpredictable but as long as i could keep it cool i will. So many things have been going on in my mind lately. I keep getting hints that my mr. right is coming any time now. Of course, when things like that happen, we will be out of our mind thinking about when, where, how and why and so on. But the more i think about it the more crazy i feel. Because till now nothing happened. Once in a while i will get this feeling of loneliness and slowly fall into depression. But ever since i did my devotional daily and reading verses that could help me cope with this 'sickness', i began to feel better, and trust me i had done a lot during my past time. I cooked, knitted, read books and even went out solo. It felt great and challenging. Most people won't agree with me going out alone but i feel a need for it, i feel so free to do and go wherever i want to. But i guess the greatest thing is to know that the Lord will never abandon us. I read from a site stating that if we feel lonely and depressed this is because there is something wrong with our relationship with God. Hence, if you are so desperate to be in a relationship just to get away from this feeling, the site suggest you take another deep long look with your relationship with the Lord. I did and i felt better, i think it's because i always take things for granted. Now, my free time instead of spending it by thinking negative thoughts i will exchange it with useful activities and also thinking about the Lord's goodness. There is a reason we are still single. I've always dreamt of serving the Lord but i don't know how, but i guess now i know, i need to be obedient and this time, REALLY trust HIM. Many times i have swayed away. Seriously, i did a lot of nonsense things just to spend the boring weekends away. 

Tips: Search the web for a list of things you should do when you're free, trust me i've tried many of them and its a great way to get all those negative thoughts away from you. 

For now, i feel much comforted than i had in weeks because i know i'm blessed and that the Lord has a purpose in doing everything. Like what He said in Jeremiah 11:29. :) Have faith in Him and be amazed as He works wonders in your life today!!!

Love despite pain

Grey day to begin with...

I guess i slept the wrong thing off last night. It hasn't been quite a good day to begin with but i was grateful for all that has been given to me. My exam went quite well i might say, but keeping my finger crossed of course. Well, i had an argument with someone, on a social network. That's how people fight nowadays i guess, we dont have to face each other to fight, that's cowardly to me. But i am not a brave person either. Anyway, i was in this great deal of pain, then i remembered something that i read during my devotional time. It mentioned that,
"Sometimes Christians waste their time fighting a battle that has already been won. It's a way of the devil to make you lose track of what is really important."

Then something dawn on me. That's seems the only thing logic to me. Then i called my mom, a.k.a my loyal counsellor, heheh.. then we talked for a long time, and like it's a message from the Lord, my mom also repeated the same words that i was thinking about, i mean how could she know i was thinking about the same thing right? well, then today i woke up feeling heavy hearted. But the Lord is good, though i don't understand His plan.

He told me "my love is a gift to the world". 

I was shocked because just last night i thought i couldn't love anymore, well,  because of that argument. But here's the thing i want to share, before this i would also add oil to the fire, and the argument would become so intense. But last night, i don't know what gotten into me. I honestly and sincerely have no feeling of anger. I tried to feel it but i can't. Because there was none in me. I never blamed anyone because all was my doing. My friend badmouthed me and insulted me with such hurtful words. So naturally i would hate her immediately. But i don't. I just feel sad and disappointed in my friend. I don't know what cause that friend to be so sensitive. My guess was i said something, and that person thinking that my message was meant for somebody. I only expressed my gratefulness, and i said I forgive but i won't forget. But that friend said, "Did i ever ask for forgiveness from you?" Well, i still forgive. I pray for that friend.

Now i am still thinking. Did i really not feel any anger at all? I guess i did get angry, but after thinking i feel this is getting us nowhere. I stopped but that person continued. I will say both are to be blame. 

But the reason i wrote this entry is not because of me.
It's for everyone out there who is facing this problem, so who thinks that they have no hope to love anymore. Today i want to spread my love to everyone who is hurt. I will pray for all of you who are hurt and in pain. I've been through all those and still will in the future but know this:

"The LORD is near to all who call upon HIM. " -Psalms 145:18

Here are some bible verses that will tell you how much Our Lord loves you and me, too.. :) [do leave comments so i know you have read it, i would really appreciate that]

Romans 8:37-39 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

God’s Love Shown Through Jesus Christ

John 3:16  “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.

Romans 5:8 but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

God Loves and Cares For Us

Zephaniah 3:17 The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing.

1 John 4:7-8  Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God.  Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.

1 Peter 5:6-7  Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you,  casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.

(All these are from http://www.whatchristianswanttoknow.com/20-inspirational-bible-verses-about-gods-love/, there are more verses i think you would LOVE to have a look at)

God bless and I'll be back next time .. :)

KL solo trip part 3 My stay there

Hi again, hope this time's entry can allow me to post more pictures. Even though everything is over i really miss the moment i was in KL, there were actually alot of places i still want to visit. Below are some pictures of places i've visited during my short stay there. Really hope to visit there again sometimes..:)

 (Inside Petronas Twin tower, pretty view)

 (Went to Petrosains, quite interesting but not my type)

 (Love it here, peace and quiet, sipping iced lemon tea, observing people, and writing my journal)

 (At Pavilion, first time in Dome, expensive food, wouldnt suggest if u r still a student, like me, i was so broke afterwards)

 (The Pavilion sign, beautiful mall, but no different than what we have in Kuching too)

(My late lunch, expensive but very nice and a lot of food too!! Fish and chips RM28, iced lemon tea RM11, phew, i felt so rich at that time,but suffering the consequences now hahah)

The only thing i didn't dare to do is to explore, one thing is due to time constraint and the other is afraid of getting lost and not being able to get out really scared the hell out of me. But in the end i still did some walking around but made sure i know where my exit  was. Then everything was fine. But i find the people there was quite funny. I went to Petrosains alone, then i bought my ticket, "How many person please?" then i replied  "One, " "One???" troll face.. Hahah, i guess it's because im a female, and its really rare for girls to go out alone. Well, i beat that stereotype and i really hope to have another chance to go out again like this sometimes. My future plan is going to Legoland, well hope that goes well. As for concerts, i have so many plans.but i will keep it in my heart because the Lord says, we can plan all we want, but God makes the decision for us. and i owe my whole life to Him because of this trip. He really kept me safe and sound. :)

I have an exam at 2:30pm later so i guess i better get going now. All the best to those who is also having exams and may God bless us always. . 

KL solo trip part 2 BIG BANG ALIVE TOUR 2012

BIG BANG IN MALAYSIA!!!

I am crazy huh?? flying to somewhere i've never been to before, and alone too. But it was really worth the experience because one thing for sure i will be doing the same thing in the future. 

I arrived at the stadium early, but not early enough i guess, because the people there were like!!!! wow... 

My guess was they have been camping there. My place is quite near but yet far, all because i came a little late, it was sad because i paid so much, but at least i get to see their faces. :) 

I love them all soooooooooooooo much!! I like T.O.P the most but at the concert, all of them looked so handsome and their personality really attracted me.. so cute and i really had the best fun i could have for the whole year!!!! There are alot of pictures i took but its so long to upload it. And i have exam tomorrow so maybe another time. God bless and goodnight!! :)

KL solo trip part 1 getting there

Getting there ...

Hahaha, finally its done. My misson. Before this it was a secret but now since its over i want to share my experience. Yup, I went to Kuala Lumpur on the 27th - 28th October 2012. Alone. Wow, big word huh?? But its true. So, on the morning of 27th, i went to the airport with my friend's help. I was so hungry and decided to eat breakfast, but suddenly i realised that i was late and my flight was ready for boarding. Luckily i didn't have any luggage so i quickly checked in. Once in the plane, i had to order food, because i was near gastric. After eating i felt so much better. But the great thing about this trip is this. Before the plane took off, i decided to read a verse to calm myself. I opened my devotional book, i started to look up something meaningful, then i saw "God's presense". So i just turned the page, what i saw still shocked me till today and maybe for the rest of my life. The title was "Flying solo". Exactly what i was doing. Solo, so I felt so comforted because the reading said that our Lord is with us so whom shall we fear and we certainly shouldn't fear being alone because we aren't. I was so happy and during the whole  plan trip, about 2 hours plus, i prayed that my whole trip was going to be fine. I slept for a while and when i arrived there i was starting to get butterflies in my stomach because i really didn't know where to begin. All i know was to call the taxi company and pray for some negotiation skills. Luckily, none of that was needed. The Lord really led people in the right timing. The taxi driver that was to send me to my hotel was the one who will be sending me to the stadium, Oh, i forgot to tell my purpose of coming to KL, it was to attend Big Bang's concert. :)

(While in the plane, eating and drinking to my heart's content)

(Like a 'sakai' because it's the first time i've ever landed feet on KL) 

(Some of the signboards i took along the way)

Well then, continue with my story, when i arrived at my hotel, everything settled smoothly and i decided to visit Petronas Twin tower. really i was amazed to see everything, the street was so busy and honestly, i prefer Sarawak and Sabah. I love peace, not the hectic and stress environment. (So thank goodness im not staying there permanently). Anyway, i asked the uncle to send me there and i spend about 2 hours walking around and taking pictures for memories. 

 (with the help of someone, took my picture with the twin towers :D )

Well, later i entered there and did some shopping, well, bought something for my sisters, then visited the Petrosains, interesting but science just isn't my thing, so to me its quite boring. Later rushed to have my late lunch at Pavilion, before going to the concert. Had so much fun exploring, if given more time, i would have went to other shopping malls as well. but i only can see them from outside, like Fahrenheit 88.. 

Anyway, went back to the hotel, took a quick shower, got ready and headed to Stadium Merdeka!!

Love is all that matters

Love ... 

When you love, you will forget all your sorrows and sadness, because you have no time to even think about it. I'm not in love, yet, but there are so many other things i love. For example, things that i love doing, currently doing revision, i love learning new knowledge, like photography. And also currently watching an english series called "Once upon a time". Lovely story, happy ending is a every woman's dream and i am certainly one of them. :) Waiting for charming. Well, he may not be what i expected but then things can work out if we're meant to be together. XD

Anyway, today is quite peaceful and calm. Since the weather is not that hot, its really a nice weather to study. In fact, i'm really happy because i've finished revising all my subjects. Now i can relax for a while, before revising once again tonight, because some of the subjects are just a pain in the neck. Be so glad once all this is over. Whoever created exams anyway? there are so many ways to assess our understanding. :) 

Holidays are coming soon, can't wait to go back to my haven. Missing my family so much. I need a comforting hug from my mom, a tease from my dad and a few fights from my sisters. That is my family. We're not the loving type, we fight but then that's how we keep close to each other. Love them. 

Love is what gets the world going. 

Waiting... still waiting ... 

I don't know how to express this feeling but i feel so much better than i had in the last few days. Peace?? I pray-fully hope so. In fact, i am no longer afraid of being alone, i welcome the solitude. Now people are afraid that i always go out alone, but i'm not, because i know He's watching over me. Of course, i am extra careful not to be the centre of attention. walking on my own makes me realise a lot of things, i can do what i want, go where i want and no one is complaining just because i take a long time in surveying things.. Or course sometimes i still go out with friends, but things changed. I no longer care what people think of me. Recluse, introvert, geek .. to me, i have the freedom of going out, it's not your world is it?? And why should i rot while waiting for others to invite me? I can also go out and have fun. :) 

Still waiting for the moment i can share all my problems and have a loyal companion to be with wherever i am. I guess now its the time for me to be independent and see the world on my own. Guide me Lord, so i will not face any danger. Protect me from all harm. Always keep my under your care. 

I got this picture from Facebook and it really made my day. 

(No copyright intended, this picture is not mine. I'm just sharing it) 

Hence, love is really important, because if only we know how much our Lord loves us, we will not waste time on useless thoughts, thoughts to hurt others, thoughts about how ugly we are compared to others and so much more. Remember, God's love solves it all. 

As for me, knowing that God loves me is all I need to keep myself alive despite all the bad things that happen in my life. God's love never dies and it will never change. 

(As long as He loves me, nothing else matters)